So you think Islamic weddings are boring?!

Amazing ideas brought to you by the Youth Club Street Dawah Team

There is an outdated cliche with regards to practicing God fearing brothers and sisters that because they are so ‘boring’, then obviously their weddings will be drab too!

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People would complain:

Where is the pumping loud Bhangra music?!

Bhangra and Dhol apparently being the ultimate expression of human bliss!

Where are the funky dance moves?!

Where is the intermingling?!

I mean, don’t we dress to impress?  Didn’t we buy the latest designer Versace suit or the latest Sobia Nazir lehanga to get noticed by the opposing gender?!

Marriage between two people is indeed an occasion of great celebration.  Islam, in its this beauty and perfection, guides us how to express this happiness within limits- like everything else in life!

If the feeling of joy and ecstasy is not checked, things can quickly get out of control.  It can manifest itself in outrageous parties where morality is thrown out of the window and extravagance is practiced on an unbelievingly extravagant scale!

To get things straight, there is no concept of dance and music (in the name of Mehndi, Mayun etc.) before the sacred rites of matrimony.  There’s no baraat in Islam, just an elegant Nikah (at the masjid, if you prefer) attended by both men and women in separate quarters.  The bride’s ‘rukhsati‘ can take place from there and there is no baraat reception afterwards.  Ah! The beautiful simplicity and refreshing convenience of Islam.  It is only the people who have shackled themselves to the yokes of tradition and culture who find this strange and awkward.

Then comes the Walima function on which everyone can enjoy the Halal fun.  Yes, Halal fun.  No sir, that is not an oxymoron.  These two go together quite well.  We need to provide halal alternatives to the usual haram stuff that goes on at weddings.

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Here we’ve compiled some ideas that we’ve witnessed at different Walimas in Pakistan and UK, and being the innovative and creative souls that we are, we’ve added our own ideas too (Hopefully, this should help you to beat the Indian/Hindu influence on Muslim weddings):

1- You can invite  brothers to display their vocal skills by reciting the Quran; Have a ‘Quran recital night’ .

2- Somebody with an amazing voice can perform Islamic nasheeds.  You could even make the venue all colourful and comfortable, use big floor cushions, dim the lights, create an awesome ambience!

3-Instead of blaring out trashy music sung by idol-worshipping people with shallow lyrics, put on a beautiful soothing Arabic nasheed or even an English one.  Perhaps even have a designated DJ who could mix  and match!  There are actually a plethora of nasheeds available for us to choose from.  Or don’t play anything at all; just let the people actually talk to each other!

4- Have a cool dress code for the guests.

5- Share light hearted, interesting personal anecdotes of Dawah.  This creates a  jovial atmosphere.

6- And why does the food have to be almost the same at every Pakistani wedding?  Why not explore the vast Muslim world cuisine and what they have to offer?  Perhaps humous and falafel or a signature Malaysian dish!  The guests will surely remember your wedding by your bold attempt at trying something different.

7- A brother actually held a quiz at his walima. This created great laughter and was very pleasant altogether.

These are just a few ideas.  I’m sure if you think outside the box, then you can come up with your own brainwaves.

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A wedding is not an occasion to show off and display your arrogance through your clothing or your vehicles.  It is not an occasion to gloat over your power or wealth.  Instead of trying our utmost to impress people or to live up to their expectations; we should be concerned about what our Lord is thinking about our conduct!

The style of weddings needs to change.  If you really want the marriage to be supremely successful, then keep it halal!  Why take away the blessings by indulging in doubtful or explicitly haram activities?   Would you expect smooth sailing on a journey that begins with displeasing the Lord?

There must be separate halls arranged for ladies and gentlemen; and female waitresses for the women.  Oh, and please keep the video people off the premises.  What kind of a Muslim bride sits on a pedestal only half dressed, decked up in all her finery with photographers falling over themselves to capture her from every angle?  And even telling her how to pose and behave like a shameless model?  And what kind of a wimpy Muslim groom is ready to tolerate this!?

This is a very small attempt at changing the traditional attitudes of how weddings should be conducted in the subcontinent. I hope other readers will pick up on this and expand on it.

I pray that the youth that are reading this show the mettle to go against the grain of traditions and be bold and trendy enough to try something unique, something approved by our Creator.

Do you accept the challenge of becoming pioneers of halal weddings?!
#QaboolHai?! 

 Let us know your ideas in the Comments section below.

14 thoughts on “So you think Islamic weddings are boring?!

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  1. Halal weddings ftw! Honestly those are the best kind, I never really enjoyed having my ears blown off at weddings. Those aren’t so fun. Allhamdulillah, great refreshing post 🙂

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  2. great article !!!
    and i want to add a few more things–

    before ur nikah/wedding..instead of the mehndi function,u can arrange a game night or something(separate for boys n girls ofcrse) like u can play the indoor games,hav competitions & hav sm halal fun ❤

    and as for the valima as u said u can play nasheeds,i thnk the youngest girls frm the families can prepare some decent poems and sing them along the Daff !! little girls look cute doing that

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  3. Good effort, but lets leave it that , like seriously? no fun music or dances, quizes, like what is this an elementary school. ptfff, wow, I know it is halal but aren’t weddings supposed to be mainly catered to adults and not to some preschool kids!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. The challenge for us is. To please the creator of all living things as well as pleasing our desires. Unless you could come up with ideas that are shariah certified then there is absolutely no problem! If keeping within the spirit of the shariah makes us ‘kids’.. Then so be it!
    Looking forward for you & others to provide more ‘halal’ ideas , as this was the whole point of the article. To inspire and get people thinking.

    Jazakallah

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  5. These suggestions are unbelieveable boring. Weddings aren’t times to recite some Nasheeds or read the Qur’an – they should be a celebration. Why does the food being muslim necessarily mean hummus or Malaysian — what if it was German food.

    What’s wrong with music and drums and dancing?

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Jazakillaahu khair…in sha Allaah i’ll try my best to make d marriage of my family members n myself too in a halal way. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Hmmm.
    Some people would agree that in a sisters only even, dancing is permissible others would say the same for singing too.

    Ideas of halal fun:
    Mendhi:
    1. Cake fight – we always do this as a family tradition when the cake is gross or with squirty toy pistols and fun confetti/ water fight is equivalent in fun level.
    2. Comedy play performance, in the past we get two aunties to lip sync and perform to a funny indian song but obviously we want to avoid the songs so it could just be a hilarious movie reference .
    3. Competitions are only fun for children. Teenagers are more interested in current trends like dancing. This can be swapped for best taals (cakes and fruit stuff like that display things) or more popularly a photo booth . (Female photographer obviously)
    Weddings
    1. Nasheed performers
    2.favours of food obviously(duh)
    3.speaches(inspirational not barf bringing)
    4. Weddings are so long what more do you need to add to them :/
    5. Funny baby photos of the bride & groom in a slide show thing
    6. Little children singing is so annoying and makes me want to throw up all over the wedding service
    7. Muslim food? How dare you. Muslim food is halal food so basically Imma eat chicken and chips if I may.
    Okay I’m bored

    Liked by 1 person

  8. just attended this type of wedding last night.
    What I gotta say?? They are very boring.
    Funny enough the girls family are said to be very islamic. Yet the boys side are not.the boys side have danced, played bhangra and other india songs. Even the boys sister likea to dance..

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